A Tale of two….ages!

I am stuck in between a “two-nager” and a nineteen year old. Lord help me! LOL!

Swing
Swing time fun!

A few days ago, I welcomed a two year old into my home. She is the cutest and the sweetest little girl. She loves to hug and tell me she loves me… it’s so cute! Although she is cute it hasn’t been all hugs love, she is two… and quite demanding! For the most part, she is a very easy toddler (from what  I can see right now)  and she is very happy. She goes to sleep singing and wakes up with a smile. Now, let’s talk about her wake up time really quickly. LOL! This little one woke up the first two mornings at 5:30 am! Today she woke up at 5:58 am… man, I don’t understand why she won’t sleep later. I put her to bed around 8:30 each night and her previous foster mother said she slept each morning until about 6:30. I hoping that once she gets used to my home, she will sleep a little later. I finally got her enrolled in daycare! She is such a social butterfly, I knew immediately that she needed to be with other kids. Enrolling foster children into daycare is such a huge ordeal! If you can find a place with availability that is the first win! If they take the voucher, that is the second win! AND if they don’t cost an arm and a leg… that is a third win! I know childcare is expensive,  but the department pays so little and A LOT of providers don’t take the voucher because they have to wait so long to get paid. I had one provider literally run me off the phone, I was really embarrassed. I don’t know why, she just made me feel so unworthy of her services. I got over that because I wouldn’t want this little one to go to someone with that attitude anyway, I’m glad I got to see what the providers character was BEFORE I enrolled the child and then it was discovered she was a foster child. I wouldn’t want her to be treated poorly. So I mentioned her previous foster mother. This little one had to move homes because her foster mom moved out of my county and couldn’t take her. Both are/were very sad, my little one still asks for her.

Driving
Driving the firetruck

So it’s back to the grind of “parenting.” Unlike the six year old and the teenager, the two year old is more like the baby I fostered last summer… but a little more work since she is mobile. LOL! Coming home from the gym, I used to set the six year old up in front of the television with her dinner while I went and got cleaned up… with the baby I was able to sit her in a swing in my room and take care of things. But this new little mamma is a busy bee! I have to wait until she goes to bed before I can clean myself up and eat dinner. I have to get back into meal prep for myself so that I can eat while she is eating as well. LOL! So needless to say it’s been an adjustment. I always struggle when a new placement arrives. I mean I love having the kids here with me, but the reality of the work it involves and the freedoms I have to give up… it makes me sad. LOL! I know parents reading this are like… “What’s new?” LOL! BUT I really struggle with it! I actually came to tears on Monday night going to bed missing my early morning workouts and running with my group, but as I laid there praying about it as I fell asleep… I woke up to a text from my running buddy’s teenager explaining that they would watch my little one while I go running in hopes to earn a little cash. Win/win! I can help a young one earn some money the hard and honest way and get to go running with my friends. It really was an answer to prayer.

woman leaning on piano while raising right hand forward
This is not the teenager… but a good representation of the “attitude.” LOL!

The nineteen year old has still been great! Even though she can be snarky and rude sometimes, she really isn’t a bad young lady. Teenagers are not my gift area at all! It’s so funny that all of my friends marvel at my patience with these kids, the young ones don’t bother me because I know they are young and are still learning social and emotional skills. I can deal with that. Older kids, they just get under my skin (I’m just being honest). I just can’t take someone that is depending on me for food, shelter, and clothing that I don’t ask to do ANYTHING around the house except clean up after themselves… can still give me a stank attitude. I don’t know if she is upset or jealous that the two year old is here, but she has not been very social or interactive. One of my friends was able to get her to participate in a game night I hosted over the weekend… and she played and had a great time! But once the two year old arrived she has been a little “ugh.” Like, I just don’t get it. I had to set her straight a few days ago. She tried to walk out of the house and not speak to me and when I said good morning and asked her if she was okay, she blew me off and kept walking. UM NOT COOL! I let her know that was not acceptable behavior and even if she didn’t feel well she still should be cordial to the other members of the home. I do understand that she may not have gotten the advantage of a stable upbringing… that’s why I am not too demanding on her. Also, she will only be with me until she goes off to college (a few more weeks). Yes, she is a very focused young lady who works, goes to community college and just got accepted into a four year college for the fall! So I do praise her and give her props for all that she has accomplished. AND I am always sure to tell her. It’s just hard for me to deal with the attitude. ME… the one my family called “tude” for most of my teenage years! LOL! I have to try more with the teenager. My friend encouraged me to do something nice for her. My feelings said, “what… nice like clean up after her, making sure she has enough food to eat (even though I asked for a list of groceries she needed and she just didn’t write it) or trying to engage with her?! But my heart said, “okay… I will try to do a little more.” #help

So life with a two and nineteen year old has been interesting! Opposite ages, but with the same general characteristics. Both can be sweet one minute and have an attitude the next, both are fiercely independent… but still need help and both think they are older than they are.

Before I finish… does anyone know how to braid hair? I mean, this little one has hair and that is not my strong spot at ALL! LOL! Just asking…

Big girls
She loves trying to play with the “big girls”

Thanks for reading! Until next time!

Author: Clarise_C

Hi! My name is Clarise. I'm currently going through the process of becoming a foster parent. I started this blog to share my journey with readers. I am not a writer, an expert on parenting, or even a parent... but so many folks have asked questions, I thought I would share. I am also an avid runner, nutrition coach and devoted Sunday school teacher (which is where I learn most of my patience with preschooler's :-)). I also work for a small agency called the VA. I hope you enjoy!

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