Season’s Greetings

It’s been so long since I have written a post, not because there hasn’t been a lack of content… but more a lack of time. Parenting an infant is not for the faint of heart. LOL! I remember in foster care training class when I told other members that I was interested in fostering infants/toddlers, they would say, “Good luck with that!” and would go on to tell me why they were not interested. LOL! Not that I don’t LOVE my infants/toddlers… but I can see why some folks opt not to do it. So, I’ve willed myself for a few weeks now to actually take the time to sit down and write. It’s the perfect time as work is not too busy this week and I’ve recently started getting a little more sleep. So on to the updates!

My little one is 9 months old now. She is thriving! I recently had a parent/teacher meeting with her daycare provider and they were very impressed with her growth and development. When I mentioned that the teacher had the wrong date of birth on the evaluation form, she was shocked because she thought the little was almost a year old, not just turning 9 months. She crawls and tries to stand, pulls up, and moves so quickly. She is a master at moving around in the walker and quickly reaching for what she wants. She recently has started to go to the stairs and although she hasn’t figured out how to climb… I’m sure that is coming soon (don’t worry, I watch her like a hawk). She has two teeth now and I think her top teeth are coming in. They must be giving her a terrible time because she sometimes just cries or puts her hands on her ears and cheeks (I know it’s not an infection). I feel so bad for her. She recently started sleeping longer stretches at night and that has made me so happy. I made the decision to not sleep train (please no comment on this, I understand all sides :-)) and she sleeps anywhere from 3-6 hour stretches at a time. She is so strong willed and determined. I love her little personality, it makes me smile. She really does think she is the boss of me… and for the most part… she is. LOL!

So although I don’t talk much about the case because it’s not my business, what I will talk about is how it makes me feel emotionally. So as foster parents, we are conditioned to know that things can change at any minute and that is why most people don’t foster. It is can be an emotional roller coaster where you have no control over what will or will not happen. Sometimes things happen that to you, make no sense… but it is what it is and you have to deal with it. So at court last month my emotions were tossed up once again. There is always a possibility of a relative to step in and care for the child. This may be the case for my little one. Although it will break my heart to see her go, I understand that this is always a possibility. How did I react to this news? Oh, I was a wreck! I cried so hard for most of the day. After I spoke to my worker and she explained that the process may not go quickly, I was a bit relieved. Still sad, but relieved that there is a process that will have to be followed to make sure the conditions are right. I just want the best for my little one. I know that may not include staying with me, so I pray all the time for her protection and all of the decisions being made on her behalf.

My focus right now is to enjoy the holiday season. This year looks different… for most of us for sure, it is so strange to not go to holiday parties or actually GO Christmas shopping, but hey… that’s 2020! What disappoints me the most is not being able to go see my family. Every year I travel to see them and spend a good two/three weeks with them and I am very sad that will not happen this year. If it was just me, I would consider going to see them. But in my county, there is a no travel order for all foster youth… so my little one wouldn’t be able to go and I don’t want to put her in respite care over the holidays. So we will be here celebrating the season at home.

I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season! Thank you for your support over this year with everything that has been going on.

* Picture was taken when she first started pulling up. Once I realized this, I promptly lowered the pack n play. She now sleeps in a crib.